Transcript From Sachin Tendulkar’s Honest Press Conference

"Okay, shoot the questions"

Question: First of all Sachin, I’m a big fan and I would like to congratulate you on your…
Sachin: Okay okay next please.

Question:  How did you feel after hitting that run and reaching the milestone of 100 100′s?
Sachin: To be honest ‘Godlike’. Obviously no other human has ever been able to do that, so it is something you guys can never understand. Uhh how do I even explain you? It is something I can share with other Gods, y’know. May be Messi will understand.

Question:  Sachin, you took an entire year to reach the 100 mark after the 99th ton. Don’t you think you took a lot of time reaching the milestone?
Sachin: Okay you tell me since how long has India been playing Cricket? Since how many centuries have the English been at this sport? They fucking invented the sport. Did you ever criticize or complain to them on why they didn’t score 100 tons despite playing for so long? I did something that has never been done, for the very first time. I took my time. My wish. Cha aila

Question: What will be your next achievement after this?
Sachin: Look I’ve been creating records for over 20 years now. It is something I’m good at and I would like to keep doing it for my country. Suits my style of cricket. Next achievement would be scoring the 50th ODI, after that I would be furiously chasing after the Bharat Ratna award, then renaming CST station to SRT station, having my photo printed on 10 rupee currency notes because it goes with the jersey number. Phew! There is a lot to achieve in life. I’m only 39.

Question: It is rumored that players are favoring the ODI’s and T20′s over Test Cricket. Your take on this.
Sachin: Ofcourse not. In fact the boys are insisting on having more test cricket overseas. Number 1 – Foreign tour. Number 2 you get to bat twice for fielding just a day and a half. It is total profit. Ever since we’ve started playing IPL, boys understand profits better than playing.

Question:  Mahendra Singh Dhoni and selectors are trying to devise new plans to win. For e.g. the rotational policy. You think it’ll do any good?
Sachin: As far as am not rotated, I’m fine with any plans that the captain or the selectors have to make. I’ll be 39 in a month. I’ve hardly anytime left for further milestones.

Question: Nation idolizes you. Cricketer’s call you the greatest ever. Fans love you. People have started addressing you as God. How do you feel about all this?
Sachin: It feels good when people love you so much. India is a cricket crazy country. Cricket is considered to be a religion. If cricket ‘IS’ a religion, well then…hahaha. Yes you gentleman from India TV. Your question.

"Vinod? Agent? Who?"

Question: You said your family gave you a surprise party by calling all your childhood friends. How was the party? And and and was Vinod Kambli invited?
Sachin: It was actually a very small, quiet and a fun party. Was Vinod Kambli invited? Well, as I said, it was actually a very small, quiet and a fun party.

Question: What are the chances of Mumbai Indians winning this year’s IPL?
Sachin: Actually, I’m not aware of any meeting between Neeta Ambani and the BCCI, so cannot really comment much on that right now.

Question: What is with the new hairstyle? Long hair?
Sachin: It is actually for my new role. I’m playing a stylish captain in the new Mumbai Indians Ad Campaign asking people to buy over priced stadium tickets, exclusive MI sports gear and other hair products.  Hence, the new style. Nothing much. Okay last question.

Question: Sachin, are you announcing retirement now? Because we really thought that would be the big announcement today and gave it out as an exclusive on our channel.
Sachin: God never retires. He only rests for a while.

5 thoughts on “Transcript From Sachin Tendulkar’s Honest Press Conference

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